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Weather: Ottawa, March 14th 2010 / 4°C
/ Light rain
/ Wind: 26 Km/h / Humidity: 52 % 
Birthday party madness
by Brynna Leslie View all articles from Brynna Leslie
Article online since January 22nd 2010, 1:01
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Birthday party madness
When I was a kid, a birthday party consisted of a homemade cake, pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey, three friends and couple of cousins. The lucky ones had hot dogs or pizza. The very rich kids took us to McDonald’s for a Happy Meal.
But today, children’s birthday parties have become ridiculously elaborate. It’s a rare occasion now that you would invite an intimate group of friends to your house to play a board game and eat homemade cake. Now it’s expected that you will invite the entire day care or the entire class to your birthday. And the choice of venue is everything.
Over the past 12 months, I calculated eight birthday parties for four-year-olds at fantasy play lands, museums, theme parks, and movie theatres.
Because I’m nosy – and because I have to do research for this column – I always examine the cost of these events after the fact (sometimes I ask the parents directly, but usually I discreetly look it up online and call the venue to inquire). The space alone typically runs the parents over $200 for 20 pint-sized guests. At a movie theatre, the basic costs more than double to about $420. That doesn’t include food, loot bags or balloons.
Like North American wedding etiquette gone berserk, these events require us to give and receive equally. We give the four-year-old birthday girl a $20 gift, and tend to get a loot bag of almost equal value in return. The loot bags range from small, dollar store toys to elaborate gift baskets containing playdough, toys, books and CDs (I’ve been embarrassed twice because I’ve given the birthday boy the same toy that he’s given my child as a parting gift). These tit-for-tat bags of junk, as I like to call them, are valued at an average of $15.
It’s no wonder that direct marketing to children in this country is a $10-billion-per-year industry. If you’re cynical like me, here’s a few tips for keeping your own party modest:
Over the past 12 months, I calculated eight birthday parties for four-year-olds at fantasy play lands, museums, theme parks, and movie theatres.
Because I’m nosy – and because I have to do research for this column – I always examine the cost of these events after the fact (sometimes I ask the parents directly, but usually I discreetly look it up online and call the venue to inquire). The space alone typically runs the parents over $200 for 20 pint-sized guests. At a movie theatre, the basic costs more than double to about $420. That doesn’t include food, loot bags or balloons.
Like North American wedding etiquette gone berserk, these events require us to give and receive equally. We give the four-year-old birthday girl a $20 gift, and tend to get a loot bag of almost equal value in return. The loot bags range from small, dollar store toys to elaborate gift baskets containing playdough, toys, books and CDs (I’ve been embarrassed twice because I’ve given the birthday boy the same toy that he’s given my child as a parting gift). These tit-for-tat bags of junk, as I like to call them, are valued at an average of $15.
It’s no wonder that direct marketing to children in this country is a $10-billion-per-year industry. If you’re cynical like me, here’s a few tips for keeping your own party modest:
- Allow your child to invite the same (or half) the number of kids as his age (If my son is turning five, he can invite five kids);
- Instead of loot bags, have your child help you design a craft that everyone can make at the party and take home;
- Make the cake yourself. Even if it’s from a box, your child will most likely value the effort;
- Have a treasure hunt, where children have to work together in teams to find a grand prize at the end;
- If you don’t want to have the party at home, look for free venues, like outdoor skating rinks and tobogganing hills, a splash pad or a playground;
- If you want to invite a lot of children, make a point of telling your guests not to bring gifts. Give them the option of donating to a charity instead (which has also become very trendy). That will reduce your guests’ expectation levels, your carbon footprint, and it will allow your child to spend a few hours having fun and celebrating, without tying the party to commercial gain.
- Instead of loot bags, have your child help you design a craft that everyone can make at the party and take home;
- Make the cake yourself. Even if it’s from a box, your child will most likely value the effort;
- Have a treasure hunt, where children have to work together in teams to find a grand prize at the end;
- If you don’t want to have the party at home, look for free venues, like outdoor skating rinks and tobogganing hills, a splash pad or a playground;
- If you want to invite a lot of children, make a point of telling your guests not to bring gifts. Give them the option of donating to a charity instead (which has also become very trendy). That will reduce your guests’ expectation levels, your carbon footprint, and it will allow your child to spend a few hours having fun and celebrating, without tying the party to commercial gain.
Oh, and marketers take note, while I have rejected this type of birthday party, grandparents, especially income-earning Baby Boomers, are a good way to bypass resistance like mine. My mom’s flying over from Scotland next month and she’s booked a museum venue for my son’s fifth birthday party.
I told him this morning.
“Can’t we just go skating again like last year?” he whined.
I guess money really doesn’t buy happiness.
I told him this morning.
“Can’t we just go skating again like last year?” he whined.
I guess money really doesn’t buy happiness.
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Amy Henderson
Comment online since January 24th 2010I completely agree with you. Although some parents may find it easier to have all the children dropped off at a location where they can run wild, this past year was one of the first BIG birthday parties
I had for my 5 year old. The party took place at home, in the front yard. He chose the theme "dress up super hero". So as I got my thoughts together on just how I was going to pull this off I thought.....outdoor carnival.
My husband and I looked around the house and yard to find things that would be appropriate for this "dress up carnival" We took apart an old shelf and nail balloons on it for a dart game, I painted a 8 foot superman on an old piece of plywood and the kids took pictures with him, we also made "villains" which we hid all around the yard so that the kids could find them. The children got to paint their own superhero mask and have a good guy vs bad guy battle with foam swords and vinyl capes(courtesy of the dollar store).
Everyone won a prize at the games, and that was their bulk of their loot bags - except for some lollipops and maybe some gum. The cost was kept to a minimum, the cupcake cake (made by Walmart) was VERY reasonable, the most expensive things was purchasing the hamburgers and hot dogs to cook.
All the parents got to stay for the afternoon and hang out playing with their kids in the sun. I have NEVER seen my son have more fun at a birthday party then that day.
Parents forget, it doesn't take a lot of money to be creative. And at the end of the day, your child doesn't care if it was the most expensive party or the best presents....just that they had a blast.
Amy H
Creative in Orleans.