Bullying without borders

That means parents need to be aware of the inherent dangers of the Internet, said Rod Oickle, an Ottawa-based Internet consultant and elementary school teacher.

Oickle spoke to about 25 parents at Trillium Elementary School in Orléans on Nov. 15 along with principal Linda Yan and community resource officer Heather Walls. The information session, which focused on the different forms of bullying and how it can be addressed, was held in conjunction with Ottawa’s Bully-Free Week, an initiative that began several years ago at the behest of the Ottawa Anti-Bullying Coalition.

“When we were kids maybe we were bullied in the schoolyard or on our way to and from school. It happened in the community, but home was a safe place. When you got home and closed the door you were safe, you could be your own person,� Oickle said.

Most parents, he said, regard bullying as violence or taunting at school. However, he added that nowadays with the invasiveness of the media and because many adolescents often have computers in their bedrooms, bullies are often exploiting the Internet to victimize their targets outside of school.

Aggressors are now using websites, blogs, chat rooms and instant messengers as avenues to reach their targets. The latest camera phones and web cams are also being used to broadcast their actions via the web.

The Internet provides a forum for bullies to get to their victims even in the seemingly safe confines of their very own bedrooms. There is now even a video game called Bully, which glorifies the actions of aggressive kids.

“Kids can’t escape that and the biggest single issue I find is the sense of self-esteem that’s damaged as a result,� Oickle said.

There are different types of bullying – verbal, physical, social and relational – each with its own definition. The more obvious ones, verbal and physical, involve behaviour that is more overtly recognizable. Social and relational aggression are often characterized by social exclusion, manipulation and malicious gossip, but they all have one thing in common, says the Trillium Elementary principal.

“The term [bullying] is used rather loosely,� Yan said, “However the specific definition is that it is an event or something that is said or done, is repeated over time and is intended to hurt. Most definitely, an element of it is that there’s a power imbalance.�

It’s a serious offence as well and should not be taken lightly, said the school’s community resource officer, Const. Heather Walls. Bullying can escalate to serious offences under the Youth Criminal Justice Act and young people can be charged with varying offences including uttering threats, criminal harassment, intimidation, assault, and slander.

“Most bullying is very effectively dealt with by the school administrators,� Walls said. “Police get involved in repetitive cases, when the same student is involved and other measures aren’t working.�

Though bullying is closely monitored at Trillium and at the other schools Yan has worked at, she said there has been and always is evidence that bullying occurs. It is often prevalent from Grades 4 to 11. And now cyber-bullying is becoming a widespread problem.

“It is important that we hear about it,� Yan said, adding the school can then take a proactive approach at remedying the situation. She suggests that parents also take a proactive approach to the issue by discussing it with their children and bringing up any issues they may experience at school with the administration.

Bullying occurs in the schoolyard about every eight minutes, she said citing a 15-year-old study, and effects 75 per cent of students at various times throughout the school year. It’s unclear just how often the Internet is being used to target adolescents.

There are several strategies parents can use to prevent their children from being victimized, Oickle said. Supervising computer use and installing monitoring software are just a few of them.

“You can do your own research, for sure,� Oickle said. “But I think it really boils down to open lines of communication with your child. That’s really all it is. If your child comes up with a bullying email don’t take them off the computer and restrict their access. Talk to them about how to avoid it and how to address it for future reference. It’s just good parenting and that hasn’t changed. That’s the one constant we have.�